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  • Writer's pictureKate

Am I Cancer Free?

I guess I got so caught up in finishing my classes, preparing for surgery, deciding on reconstruction, and making sure I stayed healthy that I didn't even think about the fact that I could be cancer free following surgery. Since February, I have known there was cancer in my body, and I didn't know how fast it was growing, or if it was spreading, or if the chemo was working to kill it off. I truly tried not to think about it. It was like this nagging feeling that it was there and because you can't see it, you don't know what the heck it is doing in there. Well, now that we know the chemo did its job and shrunk my tumor along with the lymph nodes, there is a good possibility that there isn't any more cancer in my body, since the nodes and my breasts have been removed! It doesn't feel real!

To top it off, my eyebrows, eyelashes, and hair all got the memo about the cancer being gone and are all growing at a rapid pace. The day I got home from the hospital, I looked at my face in the mirror and thought I had bruises along my brow line, but then I realized it was all the dark hairs coming to the surface just under my skin. I don't remember having that many hairs before! Same thing with my eyelashes, they are all coming in at the same time. I honestly thought they would straggle in one hair at a time and I would continue to look like an alien for quite some time, but I am pleasantly surprised and happy!

Pain remains under control. I have been doing the arm exercises as prescribed and my arms are feeling strong and I can move them more freely than when I first got home. Still no reaching, lifting, twisting, overhead movements, but I am becoming more independent and it feels good. Tomorrow will be the moment of truth when I go in for my plastics post-op appointment. I have not removed the bandages yet, although I have peeked (who wouldn't?), so hoping I can get cleared to shower and redress the area as needed. The drains are annoying, but they appear to be doing their job so I guess they can stay until they are no longer needed.

It has been pouring rain here all day, looking forward to some sunshine so I can get out of the house for a bit. I have been cooped up since Friday at this point. I think I am ready to go for a couple of short walks at least. 

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